how is this possible?

so pretty much, a lot of weird and unfortunate things happen to me (most of the time? IT IS NOT A GOOD THING.) but there was something that happened two days ago that left me pretty much very weirded out.

back story: i was in school, not running late for any classes (of course i am still considered early) and i was feeling lazy. i had a class on the last floor in maybe 10 minutes? so i decided to take the elevator (yes i know i should take the stairs especially if i am not going to exercise on the regular basis BUT I WAS TIRED AND LAZY so meh).

so i went to press the call button and entered the elevator. everything was going fine until…

the elevator doors opened and there was a mini crowd in front of the elevator doors. of course i noticed that there was a small gap where i can pass through to get through the small crowd, and i of course proceeded (yup i am impatient but whatever.).

turns out that there was something on the ground (or was it someone’s leg?), and i tripped within seconds of exiting the elevator, bumping into someone.

when i stabilised myself and had a look at my surroundings, someone that i know was actually part of the crowd (oh damn how embarrassing) and i actually made a quick eye contact with him (holy sh*t that was awkward and embarrassing). then, i apologised and proceeded into the building swiftly.

embarrassing situation aside, the thing that has been bugging me was me doubting if i actually said the word ‘sorry’ after the bump. in my consciousness, i did (i always do it out of habit even with the smallest bumps and sometimes people look at me like i am some weird little boy apologising for nothing) but somehow, my memory is telling me that i did not do so and that i am a piece of sh*t for not doing so. anyways, i do not know of how to make out the whole situation and how to solve it.

i am in fault for definitely bumping into the person (and for not being patient), possibly being the friend of the person that i know (but thats not the main point), and the crowd may be thinking that i am a rude and self centered piece of sh*t if i actually did not apologise so yeah, i basically ruined my life within a few seconds.

i hate you my brain, you cannot help me remember things and you throw me into a frenzy all the time when a sudden situation happens in front of a crowd.

anyways, i would like to apologise to the guy that i bumped into. it was accidental, it was not on intention, i have nothing against you, we are from different courses and may be friends in the future. please do not hate me and have a negative impression on me (99% of the general public has a negative impression me on first sight but whatever that is not important in this context). i have said my piece sincerely and i would like to apologise again. ‘sorry.’

-dan

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