so recently, i am trying to get out of my comfort zone and try to make more friends, namely going for more school camps and other miscellaneous events if i have time to do so.

strangely, whenever someone introduces himself/herself to me, i cannot seem to remember the looks of that person at all and it takes more than a few days before i can actually get that information into my brain.

let me give you an example to show you how serious the situation is.

freshman orientation 2017

when i first met my classmates and got to know them better when they introduced themselves while playing orientation games, i could only remember one of my classmate’s name during those 2 days. yes i know that is insane and i am also sad to know that i am a idiot that not only sucks at socialising but i also suck at memory work.

in the end, it took me a whole month to get to know everyone. and yes, there were only 21 people in my class.

lemme give you another example.

secondary 1 and 3 orientations

in secondary 1, i was just a worse than average secondary school kid that did not know how to socialise and was pretty much a loner (oh wait i am still a loner how ironic). so i did not really take part in the games and yes because of that, it took me almost 3 months to know everyone in my class.

in secondary 3, there was no orientation. the class just got together to do some admin work before starting lessons the next day, but i was not so lost as some of my secondary 1 classmates were in my new class so i had pretty much no issues at all when getting around.

‘wow dan you are dumb piece of sh*t’


all jokes aside. if someone says that, i would act like how other average person would act: get angry. but it is my fault so why should i get angry?

in all seriousness, i should give you some background context to why i was triggered to write this post.

so i was going into class today and everything was fine, except that someone tapped and called me. of course, natural reaction, i answered and said hi and gave the person eye contact. when i saw the person, my brain told me that i knew the person cause i recognised him. his leg was injured and i wanted to show some concern for him by asking him about his leg. however, i stopped myself because of a reason: i do not know his name.

i couldn’t bring myself to ask about his health just because i am afraid of him knowing that i do not know his name.

‘hey dan, you are the ultimate worst guy ever’

i know and yup i am feeling guilty. so anyways back to the story, i went on instagram and found that we actually exchanged instagrams (and sh*t i just remembered his name as i am typing this sentence) so it is proof that i know him although i could not find his name on instagram.

so yeah, my acquaintance that i only just said hello to may be thinking that i am a piece of sh*t for not asking about him. i am sorry i am just afraid of disappointing you. i hope that you will forgive me.

i am trying hard to curb this huge weakness of mine and i hope i will get over it.

please get well soon and i hope that you will have a speedy and pain-free recovery.

unfortunately – dan

ps. i have asked him about his leg and he is recovering well!


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